A Friends Farewell

This was a hard week for a friend of mine and because we are friends…a hard week for me as well.
My friend lost her beloved daddy this week after a brief but aggressive bout with an illness. She was heartbroken and stunned. Heartbroken at the loss and stunned at the speed with which this all happened. I was left breathless as I watched how quickly this whole series of events unfolded. I hurt for my friend, who lives in another town about a day’s journey from her family. I felt her pained heartbeats as she worried, paced, prayed, cried, feared the worst and hoped for the best. She barely got the chance to get home and see her dad before he was gone. Throughout the weeks that became this ordeal, she was overflowing with words of love, praise, admiration, and respect for the man her dad is and was. My favorite story was how he would come home from working third shift at the GM plant here in my hometown and stay up until his little girls were off to school just so he could have a few minutes with them before their day began.
That…is a dad.
The past few weeks have been hard to watch from a distance because I knew my friend was hurting and I wanted to offer comfort. It was painful also because I know that I will likely be repeating her situation one day myself. I have essentially accepted the fact that I likely won’t ever get the straight answer on my origins and I will one day get a phone call informing me that my father is gone. I won’t have any wonderful memories as my friend Vicky did, but I will have the same pain. The same hole will open up in my heart, or perhaps in my case it will open further. The hole is already there. I will only have more unanswered questions and more of the unfulfilled longing to know who my dad is and what he is like and hear him tell me he thinks I did okay.
Vicky reminded me, these past few weeks, of how important my job is. How many incredible memories I can make that don’t cost a dime and that have lifelong impact. In this case impact that extends beyond my own child and into the lives of those who will hear the tale second hand one day. Hopefully they will be inspired to be the man I was some day just as I am insured to try to be a little like Vicky’s dad for my little girl. It’s why I won’t quit in the face of seemingly never-ending resistance. It’s why I stay where I am instead of moving to where I wish I was. One day I will leave behind a legacy for my daughter and more than any money or possessions I might give her…I want her to speak of me the way Vicky speaks of her dad. I want the one and only regret to be the shortness of life not the quality of the life I lived in front of her. I want her children to know their granddad loved them and her husband to make a quiet decision to be a daddy like I was. (someday…as of now boys aren’t even on the radar…much to my delight)
I was thinking of another friend of mine in Nashville, who has to fight hell and high water just for a day with his little boy. I hope he gets to read this and I hope it strengthens him to continue on despite the huge emotional toll it takes to have your heart ripped out weekly and to never have the chance to even let a scar grow over the wound. Hang in there my friend. There is eternal value in your persistence. That goes for all you dads. It’s the little things that our children will remember when we are gone. Things like saying “Good Morning baby”, and having breakfast with them and looking at them with love, through weary eyes.
Well done Mr. Murray, while we never met, you reminded me of something important and it came at the exact perfect time. Take your rest good and faithful servant.

Link to Newspaper Article

http://www.tennessean.com/article/20090710/COUNTY090103/907100309/1164/COUNTY09/Banker+chronicles+fall+to+homelessness

Newspaper article about Craig!

Hi folks...
Two weeks ago I sat down with Nancy Mueller of the Tennessean's "Williamson AM" division for a very nice, and very emotional interview about my new book, the collapse of the mortgage industry, being a homeless dad, and living in a Volvo.
Nancy is a gracious and kind lady and it was an emotional interview for her as well as for me. (Thanks again Nancy and Shelly)
For those of you in Williamson County you can find the story on Friday 7/10 in the Tennessean. For those of you outside of Williamson County, and around the world...the story will also run on www.tennessean.com for about a week or so. If you go to the site just search "Nancy Mueller" on the site search, or click on the "counties" bar of the search menu and scroll over to "Williamson" and you will find it.
If you are a regular reader of this blog or my other blog, please help me spread the word by (1) buying several copies of the paper and sharing the story with friends, especially your pastors or anyone who does homeless ministry. (2) forward the web link to everyone on your address list, again, especially your pastor or minister. This is the best way to spread the news and hopefully garner interest in having me speak to churches or groups. (3) forward the link to your own local paper and ask them to consider running it themselves or better yet, contacting me for an interview of their own.
Also...if you enjoy the article, please drop Nancy an email and thank her as a friend of mine. She took the chance and was the very first media person to interview me and let me tell my story. He email address will appear at the end of the article.
Thanks to all!
Craig

News you can use

Hey guys, thought I'd use this opportunity to bring you up to speed on some of whats happening here.
Despite the fact that I have a new book out, and I've been spending a lot of time with promotions and planning for it, this ministry amongst divorced men continues to grow. God continues to bring men across my path who need a voice for their pain, and a well to drink from in the midst of their journey. I haven't retreated from that aspect of ministry, but my focus has been on the new book because the topic is pretty specific and won't have an enormous shelf life.
I thought I'd take a few moments here to let you regulars in on some of whats happening here. My website has been up and running for some time. The address has changed to www.noreputation.net. which goes hand in hand with the ministry name I selected. I didn't like the sound of "Craig Daliessio Ministries" because it sounds quite pretentious...like Carman, or something. And it doesn't capture vision of what my life and ministry is about. That would be the expression of the Man of No Reputation, as Paul explains him in Philippians 2:5-8, and as I came to know him during four months of homelessness. So if you ever need more info that you find here on this blog, use the website www.noreputation.net. This blog will eventually morphed into a true forum setup on the website. Forums are a lot more interactive, and that is what I am seeking; input from other guys in this position. Talking brings healing. Leaving comments doesn't engender the kind of interaction I am seeking here.
The book will undergo a major revision at some point this year. The content as it is written will mostly be unchanged but there are a few chapters I need to add. Topics I am adding are concerning resuming life after healing has begun, (issues like finally accepting the divorce...and you guys know exactly what I mean when I say that...resuming a social life afterwards...dating and otherwise...and a big chapter on the value of forgiveness. God is doing miracles right now in my heart and the heart of my ex wife because of the power of forgiveness. There is a lot to that story that I will share in coming weeks.
So be patient and hang in there men. I am fine tuning this ministry so that we can reach more guys like us. Enjoy your summer and walk in the love and grace of our Lord Jesus Christ.