Thursday, June 18, 2009

Stay Put!!

This is a difficult post today. Mostly it's difficult because I can't give any details.
In every divorced dads life, there will come times when the temptation is to just walk away. It's not because we don't love our children, it's because the burdens we bear in silence can sometimes gang up on us and make it seem like just getting away from it would be better than staying. We have all the worries that intact dads do but we also have the added burdens of time restrictions, child support, visitation conflicts, and the bottomless feeling of being a dad but not having your kids with you all the time. Sometimes those things become too much and if that happens frequently enough men can be tempted to quit. Some men do and it does damage that can't be undone.
Today I was reminded of the need for staying put. it has not been an easy path for me these past 9 years. many times I thought how much happier I'd be at home in Philly with my family and friends and familiar surroundings. but today some events happened that made me glad I was here when my daughter needed me. She is okay, but her situation isn't. I am still here to lend stability and comfort and the feeling that her daddy will make it okay. I missed that growing up and I will not let her feel that same fear. I miss it now too. If there was ever a time in the 11 years I have been a dad, that I needed my father's wisdom and advice it is today. Maybe for the first time in my life I am mad at him for not being there today when I need him.
Stay Put men of God...stay put. Set your face like flint, as the bible says, and don't be moved.
Blessing to you all

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